If these questions sound familiar, you have an energy problem. And that energy problem is hurting your creativity, your thought leadership, and your marketing.

The One Duality That Rules Them All

Have you heard of masculine and feminine energy?

It’s the most common way I hear energy described among women entrepreneurs, especially those in the spiritual and life coaching spaces.

It’s a terrible way to “brand” energy. Why? Because it smacks of gender essentialism — the outdated but powerful concept that there’s something essentially different between genders (“men are from Mars and women are from Venus!” ). This reduces us to our biology and reinforces the gender binary — yuck.

We could have chosen any other binary to describe the duality of energy: night and day, winter and summer, orange and blue, mountain and valley. (Putting aside for a moment the fact that binary thinking has its flaws!) However you prefer to “brand” it, this duality is part of you. Keeping it in balance is critical for bringing forth your great leadership.

The Energy of BEING and the Energy of DOING

This idea is not new, but a “rebrand” of a concept that has been in Chinese culture for thousands of years: yin and yang. The idea that “the universe is governed by a cosmic duality, sets of two opposing and complementing principles or cosmic energies that can be observed in nature.” (Source)

I like the way my friend and former client Dr. Jordin Wiggins defines energetic duality: the energy of being and the energy of doing.

What is choking your thought leadership is this: you are spending way more time DOING (producing, taking action, building, performing) than BEING (receiving, connecting, restoring, resting).

That’s because in our world, DOING is prized more than being, and it’s abundantly clear in entrepreneurship culture: Hustle. Grind. Sleep when you’re dead. Pull all-nighters. Productivity. Efficiency. Scale. Leverage. Which leads to… Burnout. Stress. Overwhelm. Anxiety. Comparison-itis. It might even be killing us.

In a patriarchal (actually, kyriarchal) culture, BEING — stillness, nurturing our ideas, taking our time — looks like “Doing nothing.” “Being lazy.” “Not working hard enough.”

We need BOTH energies to thrive in our lives, businesses, and marketing, especially if you’re an impact-driven woman entrepreneur. If you’re here to inspire and galvanize people through your leadership, over-performing on DOING will not get you there.

What Does BEING Look Like?

Think about how your schedule is set up. Are there equal parts devoted to DOING… and BEING? I know how DOING shows up in your schedule — responding to emails, burning through your to-do list, Pomodoro technique-ing. How does BEING show up?

How often do you take a walk? Meditate? Doodle? Do you create the space and the stillness you need to receive inspiration and ideas and let them flourish?

Think about how guilty you feel when you close your email and turn off your phone to drink a hot latte. Have a long talk with a friend. Nap. Go to an exercise class. Especially during “work hours.”

We are self-employed, yet the irony is that many of us chain ourselves to our desks from 9:00 to 5:00. Think about how anxious it makes you feel (to me it feels like my thoughts are hyperventilating!) when you see unfinished tasks in Asana, unopened emails in your inbox, or the pile of papers on your desk.

Even if we know, intellectually, that creative time, playful time, and restful time are as important as productive time, we’ve been conditioned emotionally to a hamster wheel. And it can be very challenging to our psyches to step off the wheel and allow ourselves to BE as much as we force ourselves to DO.

You must BE to receive your best marketing and business ideas. Great, unconventional ideas don’t come in 30 minute increments squeezed between client calls and attempting inbox zero. You can’t strong-arm your ideas into existence. Your most provocative, magnetic thought leadership ideas need stillness to flourish.

Then, of course you must take action. You must DO. Having ideas is beautiful, and giving ideas legs is how you make an impact. Trying to give ideas legs before they have germinated is how shitty, uninspired content happens. Listicles, regurgitation of best practices, and summaries can be forced. Inspiring, galvanizing, ideas with impact cannot.

Back to the questions that I hear all the time from my women entrepreneur clients: “How do I find the time to create true thought leadership?” “How can I be more edgy, and write what I want?” “How do I find fresh ideas? I feel like the well has dried up.”

The answers to these questions lie in stillness. Start BEING as much as DOING and you’ll find the answers to most, if not all, of these questions.

How is the balance between BEING and DOING for you? Let me know in a comment.

Special thanks to Amy Wright for edits. Featured image by Michał Parzuchowski
via Unsplash.

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LinkedIn:
If you’re running out of brilliant ideas, or worried about repeating yourself, what’s choking you up and holding you back is THIS imbalance. Bring it back to equilibrium for more creativity, inspiration, and impact: https://medusamediagroup.com/being/the-critical-imbalance-choking-your-thought-leadership/ by @Eva Jannotta #WomenWhoLead #WomenInBusiness #WomenEntrepreneurs #LeadingWomen #ThoughtLeaders #Creativity #Inspiration #EnergyTransformation

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If you’re bored by your own ideas, or worried you’re repeating yourself, what’s choking you up and holding you back is THIS imbalance. Bring it back to equilibrium for more creativity, inspiration, and impact: https://medusamediagroup.com/being/the-critical-imbalance-choking-your-thought-leadership/ by @evajannotta #WomenEntrepreneurs

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One time during a family dinner, my uncle explained that he’d just read a study about how social media actually makes people less satisfied with their own lives. Instead of being a miraculous tool that connects people, social media leads to envy and self-doubt.

My cousin said, “social media doesn’t have that affect on me. When I see pictures of my friend’s vacations or families or whatever, I feel happy for them, not bad about myself.”

I wonder if my cousin is an exception to the rule, because I 100% agree with the study – and those findings have been confirmed by subsequent studies. More times than not, seeing pictures of others’ lives on social media leads to lightning-quick comparison-itis. Are they traveling to better places? Do they have better clothes? Is their business more successful?

Even though you (and I) know intellectually that social media is a carefully curated window into people’s lives, we are emotionally vulnerable to its impact. We know it doesn’t tell the whole story, yet faster than we can control, comparison jumps in:

• Am I doing something wrong?
• Why does she have more likes on her video than I do?
• Did they think I looked cute in that picture? Then why didn’t I get more comments!?

The unpleasant flip side of this unpleasant self-doubt is judgment:

• I would never post a photo like that
• Really? Spelling errors? Really??
• She’s exploiting her cute kids to get attention

You either feel like a victim (waaah, it’s not fair that my business isn’t as popular on social media!) or you have a superiority complex (I am soo much better-quality than than business). Both feel shitty, don’t they?

And while you could opt out of social media entirely (I did, when I worked in corporate. It was great), it’s pretty useful when you run an online business. But what if you hate how it makes you feel? You don’t want to screw over your business, but neither do you want to screw over your psyche.

I’m playing with a few ideas:

• Just pick one. Just choose ONE social media network to work on, and eschew the rest.
• Notice your thoughts. For me the effect is obvious. I’ll spend a few minutes scrolling Instagram, then I’ll realize damn, I feel worse about my life. If I get still and notice my thoughts, I learn what’s making me feel bad. Let’s say it’s, “she writes such funny captions. I’m not funny at all.” Then I can ask myself… is that true? Do I believe that? Could I write funny captions if I tried? Do I even want to try??
• Give yourself intentional breaks. Go to a museum or park or friend’s house and leave your phone in the car. Remove the option to be distracted by social, or even to take a “perfect” picture to post later. Be present and look at the world. It’s so pretty!

But more than anything, know that there is nothing wrong with you. You’re not running your business wrong, or using social media wrong. You’re not going too slow or too fast. When “how-to” and “3 tips” posts make you question your everything, take a deep breath and come home. You’re here. You’re okay. There is nothing wrong with you.

This post is part of my 100 Blog Posts in 100 Days series. View the rest here.

Image by Yuri Levin.

The post 99: There is Nothing Wrong with You appeared first on Medusa Media Group.

LOLOLOL ROFL LMAO of course you have!!!

In the relentless world of online marketing and entrepreneurship, there are dozens of ways to feel overwhelmed every day. It takes discipline and practice and self-compassion NOT to feel overwhelmed.

If you can relate, you’re in good company. You’re normal. I’m normal. We’re normal.

First, let’s acknowledge overwhelm for what it is: fear masquerading as a socially/professionally acceptable world. We get feel overwhelmed AKA scared because of thoughts like this: I’m not doing enough. What if I’m behind? I’m doing something wrong. What if no one likes me? 

Second, these two actions help me handle my fear and keep moving forward:

Moving awareness to the heart

Yesterday I listened to this wonderful meditation for self-compassion. It reminded me to move my awareness from my head… to my heart.

When I get scared it’s usually because my thoughts are going a million miles a minute. They jump from one disaster scenario to another. They obsess over checking items off a list. It’s a tornado in there!

I can almost feel the anxious energy radiating from my skull. But if I close my eyes and get still, I can purposefully shift that energy to my heart. I immediately feel relief, like my energy heaves a big sigh.

When I center my energy and my thoughts from my heart, I realize that I’m doing enough. No one is out to get me. Nothing is as urgent as my mind thinks it is.

It’s a simple shift and a simple practice… but the impact is profound.

Breaking actions into small daily steps

I’m working with several clients in build phases of their business. They are building their Instagram following, their Pinterest audience, their podcast subscribers, their email list.

Our percentage increase goals are high. And though I’m an optimist, sometimes I get scared that we won’t reach those high goals! So I start brainstorming what to do, and then I get overwhelmed by everything we have to do and QUICKLY, and…. you get the picture.

So, after I shift my awareness from my frantic head to my centered heart, I break the actions into small steps:

• Follow 10 new people on Instagram and engage with them
• Check in on podcast community groups once a week
• Pin 10 new pins every day

I know. DUH, right? Yet how easy is it to get caught up in the whirlwind of everything you can and want to do, and feel that mind-numbing sense of urgency? It’s so easy to forget that, as Byron Katie says,

“There’s never a task too great or too small, because the only task to accomplish is the one in front of me. It might appear that there are a thousand things to do, but in fact there is never more than one.”

Just one. Follow one person. Pin one image. Comment on one thread.

This post is part of my 100 Blog Posts in 100 Days series. View the rest here.

The post 94: Two Steps to Calm Your Mind and Make Meaningful Progress appeared first on Medusa Media Group.

Hey there,

Thank you for reading this. I’m flattered. Seriously.

I started my 100 blog posts challenge in March (whew, I can’t believe I’ve been doing it for that long!), and I’ve spent about half the time surprised and delighted with my writing. I’ve spent the other half of the time thinking some version of, I-don’t-know-what-to-say-this-is-a-waste-of-time-no-one-cares-this-is-ridiculous.

And, caught up in the drama of how I feel, I forget that you’re reading this. People are actually reading what I write.

If I think about that too much, I get caught up in impressing you. Then I feel like I’m trying to hard, when the whole point of this experiment was not to try too hard. So I don’t usually dwell on the fact that you’re reading this.

But if you ARE reading this right now, thank you. Thank you for giving some of your time to my writing. It’s incredible – your time is precious and you could be devoting it to literally anything else. Wow. When I think about that, I get goose bumps.

I hope what you read here makes you feel seen and heard. I hope it makes you go, huh, and think differently. And I hope it makes you think we have a lot in common, because we do.

But even if it makes you think, that was bad, why did she write that? thanks for reading it.

This post is part of my 100 Blog Posts in 100 Days series. View the rest here.

Image by Marcus Wöckel.

The post 89: Thank You. appeared first on Medusa Media Group.

The two biggest pain points when it comes to getting your thought leadership out there… and getting it in front of the right people. 

Say you’re in the Virtual Reality / Augmented Reality space. It’s a cinch to get your thought leadership into VR/AR events and publications. But that’s an echo chamber of people who agree with you – it’s not where you customers are.

Your customers are diversity and inclusion specialists and human resources teams. What publications do they read? What events do they attend? Do they follow certain thought leaders or podcasts?

This is a tough nut to crack for two reasons:

1. Research is… frustrating

Of course you can research the publications, events, etc that your ideal customers follow. But research… it gets out of hand fast. There are SO many events – how do you pick the highest-quality one? Same with publications. Same with leaders.

There are many resources that you – and your ideal customer – can choose from. But which is the RIGHT one!? Where is your audience? What’s the best place for you to go, with the highest ROI? The challenge with research is it can lead to more questions than you started with. 

2. So many variables

A lot of what will influence the success of your thought leadership is out of your control. Maybe you write a great piece in one of the leading HR publications. Then an HR scandal breaks out, and your brilliance is buried under the news.

And then there are relationships. If you happen to know the guy who runs the biggest diversity and inclusion event in the country (because his dad and your dad went to college together), it’ll be a lot easier to get your pitch accepted to be a speaker.

Even down to nitty-gritty marketing details: the title of your content, the temperature in the room where you present, how you feel that day, the imagery you choose, your paragraph layout, the questions you are asked… there are a lot of variables!

The harder it is…

… the more worth it?

“It’s supposed to be hard. If it wasn’t hard, everyone would do it. The hard … is what makes it great.” Jimmy Dugan, A League of Their Own

(I haven’t seen this movie. When my weight lifting coach said it to me, I had to Google search it.)

In this case, I don’t know if the hard is what makes it great. The hard feels like an endless research slog, trial and error, watching other people with fewer receipts get great speaking gigs (hooooow?), uncertainty, spaghetti at the wall. In fact, it would be GREAT it you could bypass all that nonsense and just get it right the first time, wouldn’t it?

Sometimes, you can. Sometimes you know the right people or you get the timing just perfectly. So much of success is coincidence and luck and timing (and let’s not forget privilege, which can pave the way to the above) and… patience.

So if that’s not what’s happening, you’re normal. You’re not doing anything wrong. You’re not doomed. Yes, it’s tough and frustrating to find the time to produce your thought leadership, especially when you can’t know the ROI. It takes a large amount of faith and love. And that is what makes it great.

The post 87: the Faith and Love of Thought Leadership appeared first on Medusa Media Group.

Lounging in bed until ten o’clock, reading. Starting a new novel Friday night and savoring it all weekend. Staying up until midnight or later, riveted by a story.

But this morning was different. My body woke up at 6:24, and the rising sun made a bright rectangle on the behind my bed. This early in June in Phoenix the heat outside is bearable, so I went for a long walk.

When I got home I crawled back in bed, but I didn’t read. Instead I just… thought.

It made me realize I don’t often give myself time and stillness to simply think my thoughts. 

Instead, I squeeze stimulation into every moment. By reading, listening to podcasts or music, texting, scrolling through Instagram, seeing if so-and-so returned my email yet, checking my texts again.

I hesitated to give myself thinking time this morning. It felt like I was squandering my reading time. Those precious weekend hours to read my favorite fiction!

But I’m glad I did. Because I discovered that my thoughts can be as adventurous and exciting as reading a novel.

This post is part of my 100 Blog Posts in 100 Days series. View the rest here.

The post 84: Sunday Morning appeared first on Medusa Media Group.

Interestingly, new research from Duke University discovered another unfortunate effect of passion: if you’re passionate about your work, you may be more likely to be exploited.

The research found that people think it’s okay to make passionate workers do more (unpaid, extra, or grunt) work. Why? It comes from two assumptions:

1. That the work is its own reward, and
2. That the worker would’ve volunteered anyway

Yikes! Nothing can take the passion out of passion than your passion being exploited.

When it comes to entrepreneurship, many an entrepreneur has been quoted saying some version of, “if you’re not passionate about it, you’ll never make it because it’s too hard.” Nice and uplifting, huh?

Which makes me wonder: are you exploiting… yourself?

Do you push yourself to hustle without asking yourself, why am I doing this? Not in an existential way, but in a is-this-really-necessary-or-am-I-doing-it-because-everyone-else-is way.

And if you resent the hustle or the task, do you berate yourself for not feeling rewarded by the work itself? Because isn’t passion supposed to feel good?

Are you volunteering to do more than is necessary? In other words, could you stand to drop some balls or at least delegate them?

Sometimes company-running feels like hamster-wheeling, and maybe it’s unavoidable for some periods to be intense and full. It’s not a sustainable (or desirable) pace, but it’s eeeeeeeasy to get in its habit. You forget to ask yourself do I really need to do that? 

This is a gentle reminder.

The post 77: Are You Exploiting Yourself? appeared first on Medusa Media Group.

Same here. And it might come from:

• Recognition: this is not for me. It might resonate like crazy with someone else, but it turns me off.
• Opinion: I don’t like this approach the same way I don’t like peas or mushrooms. I don’t care for it because I think the style, quality, or explicit or implicit message is lacking.
• Judgment: this is bad and it’s true that it’s bad and this person is bad for doing it.

The first two are inevitable. It’s discerning to recognize when someone else’s marketing is fine or good or even great but not to your taste. And some marketing you won’t like because it doesn’t resonate with you or align with your values.

But the judgment? That’s where I get stuck. It’s one thing to recognize that so-and-so’s marketing is not for me, or to have the opinion that it’s poor-quality or unimportant or stylistically garish. But when I start to judge so-and-so, and think she’s gone to the dark side. She sold out. She shouldn’t be doing this. What does that say about ME?

What’s wrong with judgment?

Scrolling Instagram (like ya do) today I had the urge to check in on a woman I used to follow. She’s an original in the aspirational online blog space, who offers advice about self-love and self-care and living true to yourself with a lot of vibrant colors and dose of astrology mixed in.

Her brand has evolved (as they do). What used to be quirky photos of unusual outfits have morphed into kneeling poses in bikinis or lingerie, accompanied more often by that sultry parted-lips (what is that mouth-shape called? The one that Victoria’s Secret models tend to have) than smiles.

Do I sound judgmental? I feel judgmental. Why? Who cares what she does?

Well…I care, apparently. (If I didn’t, I’d glance her pictures and move on, not write a blog post about them.) Her pictures look male-gaze-y to me, and I think that’s bad. I see them and think, what attention is she trying to get with that pouty gaze?? I think, ugh, another skinny white girl in her underwear, selling shit. 

I’m sure she loves her new photos. Presumably they make her feel proud and powerful and maybe it’s the inner controlling patriarchal Puritan in me that sees them and thinks, ew. 

The truth is, judging her makes me uncomfortable.

Recognition and opinion serve YOU. Recognition helps winnow down to a brand, voice and message (position) that is unique to you. That makes you stand out. Opinions make you memorable. They will galvanize the people who resonate with your opinions, helping you become a sought-after expert known for her bold viewpoints. They will turn off the people who disagree, and good riddance.

But judgment? Maybe it comes from internalized oppression, maybe it comes from envy. Anyway, it does not serve.

This post is part of my 100 Blog Posts in 100 Days series. View the rest here.

Image by Steve Harvey.

The post 76: Why Recognition and Opinion are Good but Judgment is Bad appeared first on Medusa Media Group.

Vulnerability.

I love it. I’m here for it! I’ve listened to Brené’s TED Talks and nodded my head and felt moved to tears. I’ve read (two of) her books (and counting).

But have you noticed? Vulnerability has become another one of those words that’s bandied about so much that it’s lost meaning.

A neighbor word that’s going through a similar transformation? Authenticity.

Your brand must be authentic. You must show your vulnerability online so you can connect with people. You must write authentically while also having good SEO and solving your ideal client’s problems. You have to be vulnerable or people won’t trust you.

I like the way my colleague, Rae MacCarthy, puts it:

“so much of Instagram, even the thought leaders and colleagues I look up to, consists of folks all packaging their vulnerability the same way” (source)

No matter how vulnerable or authentic or heartfelt or adjective you are online, social media is always performative.

You’re curating what you post and what you write, even if it’s a picture of you crying. You’re posting for other people’s acknowledgment and approval (you’re not doing it for you health).

Yet you are still a tender person with a tender heart and love and fear and it gets tiring, doesn’t it, to have that wheel constantly turning? The wheel of what-will-I-post-what-will-I-say-is-this-too-much-or-not-enough-do-I-have-to-share-this and on and on.

I’m know I’m making generalizations. Some people do use social media for their health – to find connection and meaning and common interests that might not come easily In Real Life. I am sure there are people who share on social media without thinking about it at all, just for the heck of it or to update their relatives or whatever.

But the pressure can be draining. Especially when you’re online for your brand, there’s a sense that you owe updates to your audience. Because how else will you stay top-of-mind? How else will people get to know, like and trust you?

Another word on this from Rae:

“I‘m tired of being vulnerable for my “brand.” I’m tired of trying to package my anxiety for inspiration. Sometimes I just wanna live my life w/o spilling my guts about it. Sometimes when I do get more vulnerable on here, I run into people in person and they kind of cringe and say, “Hope you’re doing ok,” and I’m like, uh I’m fine actually? Why’s your face look like that?… It feels impossible to be authentic on here.” (source)

You might be rolling your eyes, because exhaustion with being vulnerable online is privileged problem – and you’re right! But it is a real experience. And it’s easy to see how lifestyle and personal brands can get stuck in a cycle of feeling like they owe their community updates about trauma or relationships or self care.

I don’t have a solution, but I have more to say on this. I’m still puzzling over what I think. In the meantime, I recommend Rae’s most recent blog post, I don’t want to be on social media anymore.

Image by Create Her Stock.

The post 44: The Pitfall of Vulnerability appeared first on Medusa Media Group.

Fear that people won’t approve if I change my business model. Or renegotiate a retainer package, take several weeks off from work, fail to respond quickly to emails, say no to a request, miss a deadline, and on and on.

It is SO uncomfortable to be scared. It makes me feel tight and clenched. Sometimes I get knots or butterflies in my stomach. It’s aggravating because I know the fear is fictional (as in, I’m not in actual physical danger) but it feels like I can’t control the grip it has on my mind and body.

When I started my business, everyone and their uncle told me, “wow. That’s going to be really hard.” I nodded politely and rolled my eyes behind their back.

As well meant as that warning is, it’s not helpful. Because, are you trying to discourage me? Prepare me? Because you’re not giving me advice and you’re not being specific about what’s “hard,” so this warning sucks. Thanks for the doom-and-gloom.

None of the, “wow, that’s going to be really hard” prepared me for how hard building a company actually is. But MORE than that? Nothing prepared me for how hard it is to pursue what you desire, whether that’s autonomy or creativity or relationships or recognition.

I know, I know – another millennial moaning about “adulting.” But it’s not that it’s hard to buy stamps or make dentist appointments. It’s that challenging yourself and putting yourself out there and pushing your comfort zones can trigger REAL FEAR. And fear is uncomfortable!

Today my trainer told me that as she prepared for the swim portion of her latest triathlon (whatever), she was so scared she was almost crying. And she had a moment of clarity in which she realized, fighting the fear, resisting it, makes it worse. You have to acknowledge the fear and keep moving.

If you’d told me that the most frequent topic in my 100 Blog Posts in 100 Days challenge would be fear, I would’ve raised my eyebrows at you. But FEAR. IS. CENTRAL!

Every time I talk with a client about writing her thought leadership, expressing her bold opinion, saying something controversial, recording lo-def videos or marketing in a new way… there’s fear.

I don’t usually SAY that to her, because I don’t want to make her feel defensive. But I recognize it because I notice it all the time in myself. 

The best thing I know to do is figure out the root cause of the fear, so I can recognize what I’m truly afraid of. Today I had a breakthrough when I realized my fear that I won’t get approval stems from a fear of losing relationships. If I don’t get their approval, they might break up with me! That would be painful, because connection and relationships are my favorite part of my work and life.

So… I don’t really have a conclusion. It’s 9 PM and this blog post took a turn I wasn’t expecting. What I wonder is, if you sit long enough with your fear of a new marketing tactic or an opportunity or a bold opinion or whatever, what will you discover? 

Image by Andrea Tummons.

The post 43: The Truth is that I’m Afraid to Lose the Relationship appeared first on Medusa Media Group.