I published my first Medium post two weeks ago. It’s received 2 views and zero engagements!
I don’t know what I was expecting. Well, yes I do: I was hoping (and expecting) that Medium’s new curation option would show my article to the curators, who would be so blown away by my vulnerability, openness, honestly, and desire to serve that they would add my article to several Medium threads, thereby introducing me to a ton of primed readers, who would resonate so hard with my article that they would clap and leave comments and follow me on social media and appreciate the lyric reference in my bio, which would catapult my career as a regular, eagerly anticipated, adored Medium writer on the topics of thought leadership and fear.
Then I would become famous on Medium for my writing, and readers would love my approach to thought leadership so much that they would want to work with me, and recommend me to their peers, which would simultaneously build my reputation as a thought leadership and build my business!
Listen, I love daydreaming. I spend a lot of time imagining what it would be like to reach the goals that are important to me. Sometimes these fantasies are fleeting amusements (I don’t actually want to do the work to become Instagram-famous, but sometimes it’s fun to imagine what it would be like), other times they fuel and motivate and inspire my work and bring help me reach those goals. My coach makes the case that intentionally visioning the success you want is an integral part of making it happen, which makes me happy because I like doing it anyway! (This is also known as “manifesting,” a word I have mixed feelings about.)
But you’ll notice, if you’re a daydreamer too, that the daydreams usually skip the middle: the part where you have to work really hard and tirelessly to achieve the thing you want. The fantasies are all fame and fortune and accolades. They are exciting and nurturing, but they’re like reading the first and last chapter of a book and skipping the middle. Fantasies rarely show the work.
(My mom and grandmother have been known to read the last few pages of a book before buying it, to make sure they like ending. I used to be horrified, but now I relate. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could know the outcome with certainty before investing in anything? It kind of sounds nice, but it also boring.)
Not long ago I started weight lifting. I’d imagined pounding out pushups, and posting videos of myself bench pressing with my future six-pack abs on display. You know what I did not imagine? Doing lunges and squats for days and days and days, building my strength.
My friend and colleague Jasmine Smith (a day-of wedding coordinator at The Coordinated Collective) calls this “the microwave.” She says, “we want things to happen like a microwave: pop it in, 2 minutes, bing!”
I could say a lot about the way our culture and the entrepreneurial news cycle makes us feel like success should be immediate. In fact, there’s a lot about our culture that breeds impatience and the expectation of instant gratification. And part of me snorted in derision when I saw how little attention my humble Medium post received. Come on, Eva, I thought. There’s nothing special about you that you’ll become Medium-famous after one try.
True! But that’s no reason to be less excited, I said back to myself. I took the first step to many unforeseeable eventualities by publishing something heartfelt and exploratory on Medium. What will I do next!?
