Marketing advice drives me up the wall. There’s too much, it seldom offers context, and it paints with a brush the width of the Atlantic ocean.
Like this: be your authentic self.
But also this: say what your customers want to hear.
Which leaves women entrepreneurs confused and second-guessing themselves. Am I supposed to use my customers’ words or my own? How can I be authentic when I’m trying to sell? What do authentic marketing and thought leadership even feel like?
These are great questions, and the answer is you don’t need to DO anything to be authentic — authentic is what you already are. Like taking off armor, it’s a matter of removing layers of marketing advice to let your true self come forth. When you do, your marketing effectiveness will skyrocket, and you’ll feel deeply connected and joyful at the same time.
Marketing Advice is Sabotaging Authenticity
I belong to a coaching program for women entrepreneurs, and how the hell to authentically market comes up regularly. You know you’re supposed to be “authentic.” This is especially true if you work in the women helping women economy. Studies show that women prefer personal relationships, rapport and trust when making decisions for their businesses.
But you’re also supposed to speak to your customers’ pain points and use their words and phrases in your messaging so they feel as if you know them so well it’s like you read their journal.
Great. What?
Coach Eleanor put it this way:
“Know your customer not to say the right thing but to be the right you.“
At first blush, the word “right” begs questions about right-for-whom and perfectionism and fitting into the “right” mold. So think of authenticity as this: being the best-est, most right-est, you possible for you.
Authenticity is Being the Best-est, Right-est You
In your favorite relationships it’s easy, right? Like when you meet someone and feel as if you’ve known them your whole life. Or when you’re with people you really really enjoy, people who inspire you to laugh and think and wonder. They make you feel like your most vibrant, connected self.
Think about how effortless and energizing it is to just BE around them.
That is what authenticity feels like. You’re not trying to say what someone wants to hear. You’re not holding back or censoring yourself. Maybe you’re even opening up more than you do with family or other friends. There’s an additive energy to authentic relationships — they make you feel good.
They give you the space and safety to be your favorite you.
A colleague in the coaching program is a trained journalist, and she used to get so nervous before reporting that she would want to vomit. And then she taught herself to imagine that she was reporting to her grandmother. That’s all — just explaining to her grandmother what was going on. And with the context of that relationship, she was able to bring her authentic self to television.
(Psst! Wondering if it’s possible to be TOO authentic?? I answer that question here.)
What Most Women Entrepreneurs Get Wrong about Authentic Marketing
Many women entrepreneurs hear the advice to know thy customer and interpret it as say what you think your customer wants to hear. You believe you have to use magic words to get their attention and make them understand that you solve their problems.
Then your thought leadership becomes mere mimicry because you’re not leading. Your marketing sounds like everyone else’s. And you feel shitty because you’re not connected with yourself and being you.
It’s like if, in another relationship, you acted like the person you think they want to know instead of your authentic self. People do this all the time — you and I probably have — and it can be a fine coping tool for awkward family dinners. But it’s a feeble marketing tool and a dismal thought leadership one.
The One Thing You Must Do to Market Authentically
“But wait,” you’re thinking. “I have friends with whom I’m authentic. But that’s different than writing to my list or publishing a thought leadership article.”
Actually, the only thing you need to do to market authentically is decide to be the best-est, right-est you. You can make the first move — you don’t need special permission. In fact by being authentic first you are granting permission to your audience to meet you where you are: in that effortless and energized space of authenticity.
Authenticity doesn’t spontaneously poof into existence. It grows as relationships evolve, but it starts with a decision. And when you are communicating with an audience, you must make that decision first. You get to choose yes, I’m going to tell them that. Or yes, I’m going to share that I love astrology or that I swear like a sailor.
Tune in to how you feel when you’re communicating with your customers. Do you let yourself be silly? Do you use words and phrases you love? Do you disagree when you need to? Do you open up the way you would a beloved friend or grandmother?
Forget what you’re supposed to say. Let go of what you think your customers want to hear. What do you want to say? What do YOU want to hear? What makes you good? What would you say if you felt safe?
This is no listicle of Authentic Marketing Tactics. You’re up to your eyeballs in well-meant but confusing advice. Besides, you’re already authentic.
I promise that choosing that effortless and energized place will catapult your return on marketing effort. Your thought leadership will attract adoring fans and repel haters (which are the only two signs you need to pay attention to).
Equally (or more) importantly, it will make you feel great. The good feels come when you’re connected to yourself, and when you’re connected with yourself you are magnetic to your audience.
Now, if you’d like to take your authentic, heartfelt thought leadership to the next level, may I introduce you to the 5 Magnetic Pillars of Thought Leadership?
The impact of thought leadership on lead generation and clients can’t be overstated: Over 80% of decision-makers say excellent thought leadership increases their respect, perception of capabilities, and trust in an organization. And 60% of those who are willing to pay a premium say it’s because the thought leadership of that organization demonstrates deep thinking and other virtues decision-makers value (source).
How can you make your thought leadership sing?
The 5 Pillars of Magnetic Thought Leadership.
It’s free, it’s just 5 lessons, and it’s got exercises, examples, and insights to make your thought leadership as magnetic as ice cold water after a marathon.
Click here to join the free email course, 5magneticpillars.com.
Image by CreateHER Stock.
