Living in a north-facing fourth floor apartment in Phoenix means that we get quite a color show every sunrise and sunset. Sometimes the oranges and pinks and purples are so vibrant and searing that I shake my head and laugh.

There are many moments during the day when there’s so much to worry about and so much to do. But then I see the sunset, or the exuberant bougainvillea that grows all over Phoenix, or Steve smiling, and I think… maybe I’ve got this worry-to-do-list thing backwards.

So I return to an ongoing debate: can I make progress without anxiety? Can I fulfill my responsibilities excellently without worrying that I’m doing something wrong? Is it possible to negotiate or ask for what I want or say no without feeling dependent on the response?

Many a successful woman has said that her best practice is her gratitude list. I believe her: your thoughts become your words become your actions become your habits become your values become your destiny, Gandhi said (who am I to disagree with Gandhi??).

Besides, how could spending time being intentionally, thoughtfully grateful every day NOT be good? I think I need at least an hour of that every day to counterbalance the incessant worry.

BUT I LIKE TO DO THINGS DIFFERENTLY, so instead of a gratitude list I’m making a Signs of Affirmation List. Except yuck, I don’t like that title. Signals of Validation List? No, that sounds sterile.

Good Signs:

1. When I told my client that I was taking a day off, she didn’t say she hated me (I get SO hung up on taking time off. Why??)
2. The sunset. Anything that beautiful is a good sign.
3. A “yes from a new acquaintance to be on my Facebook Live Marketing Show
4. A connection acceptance from a prestigious woman on LinkedIn – AND she viewed my profile! (I messaged her and I hope she responds, but let’s NOT be dependent on that, Eva!)
5. Good ROI for the goals – reach and link clicks – on a new Facebook Ads strategy I’m testing for a client
6. A client asked me to do something I already planned and scheduled to do. A sign that we’re on the same page and I’m handling tasks for her so she doesn’t have to worry.
7. The fact that I’m writing here every dang day (today is 25% through 100 Blog Posts in 100 Days!). Quite a sign and statement that writing is important and that I’m brave enough to experiment.
8. A few people told me they liked my articles, which means a LOT because I haven’t been promoting them much at all.
9. I gained four pounds in the past few weeks – a positive sign for my power building ventures. I’ve been eating WAY more calories and protein, and things are happening!
10. My client loved the tweak I suggested for one of her tweets. It’s a simple thing, but her enthusiasm and gratitude made me so glad.
11. Steve asked me a very thought-provoking question about my work – one that has given me a lot to think about. It’s a sign that I’m maturing as a businesswoman.
12. My sweet friend Sarah sent me Marlee Grace’s book. Reading it is very affirming of the way I want to write, work, and build my business.

It’s different than writing a gratitude list. Gratitude is amazing – so humbling and grounding – and when you stop to think about it, you can feel gratitude for just about everything.

But I like how it feels to actively look for signs. It’s like when you’re in the airport and you’re scanning for the right gate, and when you see the sign for Terminal C Gates 1-17 there’s a burst of relief and satisfaction: I’m in the right place. I know where to go next. I can get where I want to go.

Perhaps an antidote to worry, to that overwhelming urge to DO, is to scan your reality for the positive feedback that what you’ve done already is great.